Like a girl

Note to my amazon self

Standing up for myself. My own selfish self. Listening to some vallis alps, and realizing. 

I missed winning a 5k race today. The girl winning thanked me to skip the race as I never started running it at all. I smiled at her and felt proud. Got some self-esteem of the last months back.

Being a woman, being one fvck-ass strong one, sensitive mixed power and straightforward, my way my say. No more feeling sorry for myself. No more feeling romantic and lying to myself. I’m built up with love and strength now, and dealing with it. Relied on things, but it’s time to believe in myself. 

Summer is on.

Please stop the useless chatting with strangers – deal with myself. Sorrynotsorry but this time I’m me, and from now on I will be me. 

I got a bracelet as a present today. It is a 4m long string, a survivor kit kind, thanked for it and put in in the drawer. Funny how things reminding on things are although pretty and lovely as a gift are just not acceptable. I don’t need to be survived, I can do that. Hopefully, probably.

Hide and blocked some chatters and blokes today. I’m not based and relied on their actions and their nice words, words mean nothing other than making me feel like a bitch. And I’m no bitch, I’m not someone to be used, just as I don’t use people just to feel alive, perhaps better. I feel good if I feel good.

Summer is on.

My own uitstraling ( word in dutch since I don’t know the english one) I should stick to. Hello world. It’s me, take me or fvcking hate/leave me.

End of powerspeech. Over and out.

And you’re welcome, I can make life easier, decisions are easy if commited to do so. Chatters, you are released for good. The ones kept, are the ones important and filling me up, as I hope I can give the same back too.


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