Nevernot

  
Or at least I thought so. Being strong doesn’t necesarry means being strong. Sinus stole the show for week one of February, not that I wished to overdo run anyways. I would if I could physically but mentally or more precisely guilt-factor-wise too. I’m nowhere near ok but back for good and took my sinus for a run. Ok as being released from sickness, and ok as being overall ok, generally speaking which is worse than being sick. Sad intstead.

It was afternoon, kinda springish, kinda nice, no hat but I kept my gloves on, that’s something comforting, 2 fingers version, so to keep them happy together. At least they can be. I bought it from this well hidden trailrunning expertise store next to the Suzuki salon and next to my coffee brother’s workplace which is next to this paleo pastrystore where he always has to grab an afterlunch sweet, that I only know because sometimes we don’t only share coffee break but I pretend to eat lunch with him. I don’t really get the purpose of eating rather than for social aspects, I usually never get hungry at noon therefore lunchtime doesn’t really exists in my work-schedule nor my understanding facts of life list.

Me, my sinus and my gloves started the lap on Margaret Island the outside route where amateurs and wannabes run in order to avoid any surprise enctounters pushing me to push pace. The island when and where it seemed to be more lovebirds than runlovers that early evening. I began to get lost in my thoughts thinking how it might really is happening, spring knocked in and pushed winter aside as early as February I was wondering and getting excited, while passing a guy running in shorts and some extraweird looking volt colored nikes I decided to be a boxingshoe. He was loud at every step so kept hearing his rhythm for quite a while. But suddenly another noise of rhytmicality came into hearing distance and it wasn’t the man who just stepped in front of me to soon leave me and my sinus alone again. It was an elderly man instead hitting one of the trees along the track barehand. Heavily breathing, wearing black trousers with 80’s Jesolo market style leather jacket having his plastic bag casually thrown next to his leg. He stood in an offensive position and I didn’t have enough time to take a good eye whether it was a workout or he was that pissed. I kept running and soon found myself close behind the runner guy I thought would totally won over my speed just a minute ago. I eased down to his pace realizing how scared the boxing man made me and how it actually got dark in no second. Lovebirds kissed their last but most passionate ones, afterall it isn’t spring yet and gets dark by 5pm still. I was glad I was running in company, or at least behind a well-built man. But he soon seemed to slow and I needed to pass him. We kept running hearing his steps behind keeping me safe to be with my thoughts. He once again passed me, later I passed him back, l kept my pace even but he didn’t seem to do any speed work either, I guess I just bothered him for passing. I on the other hand was glad that he is around, lovebirds and other runners dissapeared and the darkness took over making me anxious more and more. I wasn’t looking at my watch on purpose I wanted this one to be a good-feel run, and indeed this guy’s pace seemed enough, just a bit out of comfortzone but still feeling happy to run. Turning onto the second round he was front of me and I started to get excited that he is also ‘joining me’ for the next lap. Gladfuy acknowledged that the tree-boxer a’ freestyle left however.

I eased back to my thoughts soon realizing that the guy front of me is gone, he didn’t speed up, he finished his training, bummer, he got tired in a lap, in a pace like that. Made me grin a brief one, half proudness and half feeling sorry for it. Solo lap in the dark was ok, I like running alone I guess with no expectations only for the pure joy. Though I miss my partner in running crime M in these times too, but it just feels good to be able to go silent mode for no specific reason. Taking a big breath of loneliness I guess. 

The day after I went again, this time with crew and with M but silence remained, was too early to open my mouth up, still making me uneasy on the fact that we totally lost something along the way, our union is all gone; but & and I took it as another big breath this time starting in the dark finishing in daylight, still before 7pm. 

Nevernotrunning.

With a week of MIA after. 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s