Running that road. And the clock is ticking. I get over with the run of the day, perhaps two if time permits, zero control on what and how I run whatsoever, but does it really matter. The road is the important part, the rest is to celebrate. Life-wise. I turn to inner self, turn to some specialty I own, my soul. My soul that opened up to the clean to the unexperienced to the new. To believe I can do it. Race-wise.
Life-wise got the extrakick the new way the ‘believe in myself cause I believe yoself’ that got me to actually kick my own ass run-wise. It was something I than and there realized, appreciated my own way and was totally shocked in a positive way. It works. It worked.
I never feel alone, though I lot of times feel alone.
So many marathons and halfs, running the same circles though every road to seems different. Is it really?
I look in the mirror, and suddenly it hits, the realization, I look myself depending on the mood. And my mood comes from life as the moment, how I feel inside, how I behave with my body and soul. Happy I see my image skinnier and more presentable, I wear my jeans and running thights more comfortable, it suddenly fits. I get the confidence, because I’m believed by. I can wear my jeans the one I chose to wear, I feel ok, and don’t have to change 5 times before I finally start to cry menacly about how bad I look. The mirror is something of a reaction from the inside. Wow, 37 years of wise-ness arose. R e a l i z a t i o n.
Translating it to run-wise, the road should be comfortable in this terms as well, like confindent, still hard to survive the track attacks but still realize its beauty towards the road. Is that even possible in running terms? To actually finish up a shitty session dead and tired, like looking into the mirror to see myself ugly run-wise slow, but than again thinking the next day the next looking into the mirror will be better next run will be awesome?! Will it be?
Gotta stand up. Look away. And do the work, while enjoying it.
Probably nothing new with these words, just writing it out loud.