Moving on

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From MOVEMBER to DOCEMBER
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November was happy, sometimes sad, or even sadder. I ran two marathons: one in the beginning and one in the end. I ran a PB and I ran an easy peasy one. Both were super cold, and full of feelings. New York I so so miss, and hate the fact, that dealing with the elements I really wished to enjoy more. But at least to live the moment, which I forgot that time. I was so occupied, I was so somewhere else … probably shouldn’t – the only regret of the month.

I already want to go back, although I so hated the run, I so hated crossing the finish line being cold, I couldn’t even talk on the phone. And perhaps I shouldn’t anyways. Dream come true New York I so wished for, and I so messed it up, because of me. Running a PB gave no hapiness either.

Never really feeling sorry for myself, I hit the wall as usual around 35, and probably that is where I should pushed myself.
Same happened on the end of month marathon. Gerilla Marathon,
organized by kvazibarki crew, I once again felt the need to feel sorry for myself around 35.

I’m 35 coincidentally, but I cannot, and won’t ever feel sorry for myself. I push hard, and I set my own limits, usually on the edge, and l cry too, oversensitivity meets harsh character but this is why I am who I am.

For a brief encounter called November my ME run felt interrupted, the calmness, and highness running gives me was taken away from me, however I was the one choosing this path. But it is fun to run in crew, especially in this crew, and although things are changing, crewlove remains.

Moving on to December, with the weather and personalities getting colder, I wish to run, no matter the circumstances. Because it should be fun after all. Get on DOcember.

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Love.running

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One full post dedicated to the love of running. Never thought l would, nor l was looking for to run ever again in my life.
It is like a drug. Or whatever, they call runner’s high, l call it love.
There are days when you think you can but also days when you think you cannot live without.
Sense and sensuality…
I feel so attached. And l seriously cannot answer why l need or want it, other than for the pure calmness, the power, and the emotions it brings up, and saying goodbye only happens til next time.
I was never looking for anything like that, l was ok with my life, so-so ok l guess. But now my eyes are wide open and l realized l’m hundred percent sure. Love of running.
Fvck yeah for this, l’m happy about it!

These flyknit lunar+ are over their time, my favorites ever;(.
Gyakusou still going strong, basically covers my whole life – undercover love or hate.

While the mood is on, i listen to stunner from the album sadnecessary.